Horoscopes. Because you're worth it.

(this is where you do a hair flip)

I’m not going to lie. I, and many of my colleagues in the spiritual world, are having quite the time balancing on the razors edge of a few key things. The real, nitty gritty readers will not tango with the Love and Light rhetoric of “everything burns down but if you feel okay, you are okay”. There’s a real leaving out of the rest of humanity—-which if you’re in my country of residence—is how we got here in the first place. Last week I wrote that we have a right to the deeply personal which is how I get myself to continue to make content. I channel because it’s what I do and it keeps me in touch with the bigger picture and all of you.

Please remember that in the most scientific and spiritual way, community does not mean leaving people out. It can mean protecting your community from those that are harmful (I’m not talking aobut the social aspect) but humanity works on a network that we insist doesn’t exist. Be strategic. Just work for the greater good. Everyone deserves food, medical support and education. Yes, I’m talking about the cuts to SNAP benefits that start in September.

And for the record, none of this is okay.

Now, on with our regularly scheduled programming.

ARIES

Sometime you are known as the friendly trucker of the zodiac. Maybe I’m the only one who has said it but you are the big smile, honking the big horn, waving your trucker tanned arm out the window with god-knows-what that entertains you hanging form the rear view mirror. Carrying cargo that you hope brings joy to the world—-or at least a necessity. This week please remember that you are that person. Not to sound like the worst uncle at the family reunion but SMILE first. Get your body activated to positivity and friendly support. It will help you from teetering on your dark side.

Your card: Queen Of Swords

TAURUS

I hope you have some time on your hands—if not, make some. This week is about VANITY and GLAMOUR. It’s about getting your hairs did and nails nice and doing the moisturizing a bit more intentionally than slapping it on your gorgeous puss and walking out the door. Adorn yourself this week. MAKE YOUR BODY YOUR ALTER. How ever you feel best, make today the body version of “use the good china”. Wear the nice stuff. What are you waiting for? Since day one of the human experience adorning oneself was a spiritual experience. I THINK IT’S TIME TO BRING IT BACK AND YOU ARE JUST THE PERSON TO BE THE GRAND MARSHAL.

Your card: Holy shit, it’s The Empress (yes, I pull after I channel)

GEMINI

You may have felt recently like all the magick around you (and the K is there on purpose) has been nice but not as big as other people’s. And I get it. You love big and brawny and glittery when it comes to the real good stuff. The week is a week of prep because as I’m reading it, the coming weeks thereafter are big. So rest up because big can also mean exhausting and you may have a tendency to try to halt things due to the need to control or just good old overwhelm. You got this and remember, healthy detachment is key.

Your card: The Emperor

CANCER

Your sense of duty and honor are really impressive. It’s part of who you are right down to your saucy Old Bay Seasoning. This is a week to ask yourself “Am I being too honorable? Do I need to think about me?” This isn’t a call to hit the road, you crabs do walk slowly but perhaps it’s time to see where you need to loosen your own laces. Where did you tie yourself up too tightly? What do you have control of but insist it’s a sense of commitment when really you need to breathe and can still not blow up your life? Buy yourself some flowers. Visuals are important for you right now.

Your card: Queen Of Wands

LEO

Business strategy. Looking at numbers. Figuring out moola. I’m not trying to bring you down. You’ll thank me. I’m actually brining this up not because of having to prepare for the worst but because this is a key time for you to do these things. Your brain this week is the body part that is shining through and the part of your gorgeous brain that is sharp this week is the part that can refigure all these things. A small crack in the veneer to let in the power and freedom of anything monetary.

Your card: Six Of Cups reversed

VIRGO

If you don’t know your rising and moon signs, go find them out. BECAUSE there is a self image thing going on here and I want you to look at the other signs that may in fact be more you at any given time and rejoice in all that you are. There is a tendency this week to slip into the banal when it comes to your own energy and please look at the other things perhaps you don’t know about or have forgotten and remember, every gangster is also royalty. You are multitudes. Try on a few things until you feel better.

Your card: Four Of Cups

Hilma af Klint, Group IX/UW, The Dove, No. 14, 1915

LIBRA

Everything about your read this week is completely somatic. This week it’s about your DNA. Learn about whatever people you come from. Let the cells in your body resonate. Find out who their witches, shaman and medicine people were. EVERY culture has/had them. What were their traits? Know that they are yours. If you don’t know about your genetic ties, sit within your body and ask a question you’re afraid to. Remind yourself that your body is perfect divining rod.

Your card: The Moon

SCORPIO

If you feel giddy this week I wouldn’t be surprised. There’s a “rise up” vibe coming from the lot of y’all that I am loving. Largely because you are needed in ways that we don’t get to see from just one sign. Your capacity for bright energy when you allow yourself along with the cunning through darkness that you’re known for is keeping you in possible leadership roles these days. You’re somewhere between an earth sized kaleidoscope and a dirty old reliable road atlas right now. Just what we needed.

Your card: The Tower reversed

SAGITTARIUS

That random creative thing you’ve always dreamed of? The thing that pops into your head every few years? Or once a decade? Or it did when you were 17 and now all these years later it’s back? Have a grab at it. Things marinate in our brains not because we’re procrastinating but because they’re waiting with you. Until you have the developed frontal cortex or financial resources OR the skill to work around all of the above. This is such a good week for flexing muscles you forget you have and to remember that there are cells in your body that are still in vibration with the you that thought of that fanzine, hand built boat, non-for-profit model or class to take that very day.

Your card: Knight Of Wands

CAPRICORN

Silence. Not from you exactly but it is something we’re missing right now and it is something you could really feed off of. One of your amazing abilities is that you have the capacity to gain energy from the brilliance of what we think of as nothingness. Things that fall into that category are silence, space (both the galaxy and open air), darkness, floating in water. Let yourself drift—-which isn’t so much drifting for you Caps as it is recharging.

Your card: Seven Of Swords

AQUARIUS

You are fine. Truly. So this is me saying “Be careful of the nervous system”. Your sense of stability is off. You are the sign most aligned in my readings as galactic and your sense of “oh my god did you feel that tremor??” is more sensitive than most. We do love you for that. This week breathe a bit more. Rattled is not a good look for your sensibilities. If you must, imagine yourself as wind: moving and tossing but never hitting into itself. Also, make sure your pillow cases are changed. Your skin is supersensitive right now.

Your card: Ace Of Pentacles reversed

PISCES

Oh crap, I know you’re the fairy girl at the music festival of the zodiac some of the time but this week you are cleaning up other people messes. You’ve stayed behind to help the clean up crew. I don’t hate this for you but no free labor, dude. Take this situation as an information gathering expedition. Take note. Take the free t-shirt. See how whatever you see resonates with you. Some manual labor isn’t ever bad. Just find the right gig.

Your card: Two Of Cups

Thanks for coming to my astrological TedTalk! See you next week!

xoHC