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Mel Torme's This House Is Haunted

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This House is Haunted

These are weird times to write horoscopes but as I’m reminded by everything in the world, we still have to get up everyday, take care of our loved ones and consider our present and future without freaking out too much.

One thing to remember (it came up while I’m writing my book) more often than not, we don’t panic things into happening or manifest them. We actually see them coming. The trick is to know this, say thank you to your nervous system and intuition and then come up with a plan in case there’s not a speed bump or a change in the spiritual GPS of what you’re panicking about.

So be prepared. Don’t think too far ahead but make sure you have a plan for your emotions. What makes you feel better? What can calm you down or sharpen your thoughts? It’s not what you let your imagination run away with, it’s where it started in the first place. You have tools to survive if you listen.

I’m also using the TAROT OF THE HAUNTED HOUSE by Sasha Graham to pick your cards today. They’re so awesome, I’m showing you all the cards.

Now on with the horoscope show:

ARIES

I know it’s finally your season——your raucous, crazy season but wow, it’s the week for things to work out. Notoriety, praise, the works. It’s full on YOU TIME. Next week someone might think you left a scorched earth behind you and feel sore. Be mindful of jealousy and someone who needs attention

Your card: Six of Wands

TAURUS

If you think you don’t like to leave the house now, this week will confirm it. It’s a week of domestic bliss. Whether that means finding the perfect paint color for your power room walls or just everyone not killing each other this week, it’s a time of working out. Pro tip: in your bliss don’t avoid things like bills and taking care of yourself. Feeling good at home can sometimes distract from your basic needs. Funny how that happens…

Your card: The Queen of Pentacles

GEMINI

Bull in a china shop. Careful this week, Gem. There’s a tendency toward an abuse of power or just feeling your own fertile presence that you know everyone over and piss a few people off on the way out. Keep to your usual beautifully intuitive self while you’re feeling like a chosen one. You’re not really chosen but you’re not not chosen. This is a week to remind you that you are human. Just like everyone else.

Your card: King of Wands reversed

CANCER

Please recuperate this week. Relax, reflect, recount. It’s time to see where perhaps you goofed. Or where you can just feel better. It’s really a time to hone in on where you lack the good graces to make yourself suitable for public consumption. Be better or just sleep more. Also, mend some fences. Emotions can be your bad habit since you wear a shell.

Your card: The Four of Wands

LEO

In your amazing clarity and vision, Leo, make some truly unbiased judgements. It’s time to show that you’re not just beauty and charisma but a thinker. A real brain to be tampered with. It’s a time of critical thinking and sharp, clear opinions that truly sit not on “how you were raised” but of your learned history.

Your card: Queen of Swords

VIRGO

Let it go. Please just surrender. Don’t sit in the “you must be this because this is your sign” trap. When Virgos let go of all the burdensome things they can be the wildest kid at the birthday party, high on sugar and piñata candy. Release this week. You have magic in your hands this week and the only way you’ll see it is if you let yourself be unfocused and loose.

Your card: The Hanged Man

Tarot of The Haunted House by Sasha Graham and Mirco Pierfederici

LIBRA

I know you’re completely self sufficient but this week, snuggle bunny of the zodiac, it’s your week to look for some guidance. Ask a few professionals and then a few people who are ragingly unacademic but full of life experience. Then ask a complete stoner and then you’re aunt who you never clicked with but what have you got to lose? It’s a week of seeing what’s out there and then deciding if you evens want to have an opinion.

Your card: The Hermit

SCORPIO

Hey, you. Yeah you. It’s an emotional time but I’m worried in your need for balance you’ll get cold and too guarded. A lack of patience. Chill. Get soft. Feel yourself at all costs. You may have a knack for losing someone’s trust this week so make sure you’re on time, have bail money for friends and always leave the car full of gas.

Your card: Temperance reversed

SAGITTARIUS

Stop with that self doubt. I see you. There’s no need for that. Pull it together. The curtain goes up in 5 and we need you to see you for what you are. The producer, director and star. You’ve got this in ways you can’t see right now and honestly you’re in a moment where "if I can’t see it, it’s not here” can be very persuasive for you. Trust and the net will appear. With snacks.

Your card: Strength reversed

CAPRICORN

I almost didn’t recognize you! Action! Energy! The urge to take risks! You’re making me blush. This week is a great time to gamble on things you know will turn out but when thinking too logically you could pull back on. I’m excited for you. Be as bold as you feel.

Your card: The Knight of Wands

AQUARIUS

You are seeing all the fruits of your labor, kiddo! Honestly, no joke. And if you believe what you reap, there’s space for it to all keep going. Be scrappy and KNOW deep in your heart what a success looks like and how to get there.

Your card: Nine of Pentacles.

PISCES

Good thing you got two fish with opposing directions because there’s a juggling aspect to this next week. It’s really a time to find your equilibrium. Remember your strengths and remember: weaknesses can become strengths if you put your mind to it. Excuses are only from within. Also, get rid of negative people. Time to change perspective.

Your card: Two of Pentacles

Thanks for coming to my astrological TedTalk! See you next week!

xo H